if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
So if a girl goes for it you're gonna stop her and tell her you gave up ejaculation for lent?
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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