I heard we made out
I think I won the penis lottery.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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