He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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