Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
Can you explain to me later why there's a pirate hat in my bathtub
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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