tell your sister to shave her snatch
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Randomize
