im holly from the hills drunk
Been drinkin since 3, wearing a tutu, how could things go wrong
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I paid your brother in tostitos to drive me home.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Don't be offended, the only thing I'm attracted to right now is snack cakes and chicken wings.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize
