Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Randomize
