After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I am on top of a rooftop peeing on your freedom
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
