I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
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