at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Randomize