Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Bro... You handed me an ice cube from your drink and said "tell me if it tastes like pickles".
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
