he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
How many times can you lose to your mom in beer pong before you can no longer show your face around campus?
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
