I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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