Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
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After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
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Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
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