She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
you will always have a special place in my vag
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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