dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize