I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
