I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Right. Cuz nothing screams "You made it!" quite like selling your used underwear to strangers you met on the internet.
Randomize