Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Tinder date just called. I was supposed to be there 30 minutes ago but I'm on a 27 game win streak in Park...?
Fuck that man! Tell her your dog died or something. Reschedule that shit, you can't stop 2K at a time like that. Ball is life bro... Priorities.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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