Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
like a sex slave...but with a better dental insurance plan
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
Randomize
