who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
false alarm. still invincible.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
