Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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