...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
She described it as "a squirrel being hit by a hurricane"
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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