you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I'm hungover laying in my moms bed watching Space Jam.. Adult Life..
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
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