I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
