My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
I told my mom I had sex with him and even SHE was proud. Now that's saying something.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
