so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
