You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
