i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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