Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
he told me he wanted to get "words" tattooed on his penis so he could say hes always putting words in my mouth..
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
