I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
