You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i just google imaged poop.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
He pulled over in the Compass Bank parking lot so I could dry-heave, but I decided I couldn't vomit there because "I bank here."
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Randomize
