sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
You suck. You're fired. I need to find a less reasonable voice-of-reason.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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