He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize