She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
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