Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
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