Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
Mistakes were made. Hot mistakes that I want to make again. But tapping your employee is def a mistake. Esp in front of two other employees.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
I'm keeping both. The way I see it, boyfriends come and go, but a good dick is forever.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
Randomize