Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Dude. When are you coming home? I'm laying in bed watching the Grinch and trying to pet a cat that I'm not even sure exists.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
Randomize
