Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
Just got blown whilst wearing a glow in the dark superman t shirt. Your night will never be as good as mine.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
Randomize
