Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
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