I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
Unfortunately hes not a hipster douchebag with no life goals, so naturally I'm not interested.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
