Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
Randomize
