In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
These 25 Drunks Should’ve Gotten Cut Off A Long Time Ago
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
27 Freshmen Who Really Didn’t Know What They Were Getting In To
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony