i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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