One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
My boobs weigh the same amount as 25 pancakes
Randomize
