I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
Randomize
