we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
At the funeral we'll say nice things, like "She was delightfully extreme, psychotically wonderful, and could probably drink all you fuckers under the table."
That's literally the perfect eulogy
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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