I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I can't believe I am actually paying for a night in a hotel for my parents so I can throw a party the night before Christmas Eve. I also can't believe they think it's their Christmas present.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Randomize
