we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
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