We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
