I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
